Okay, we hear this a lot, how you need to Find Your Tribe, but what does this mean? This means the people who you go to for all the things. The friends who are usually moms also, so they get where you are coming from. These are the people you turn to if something is going wrong, and you need someone to pick up your kid from swim practice. Or you need someone to just to listen to you rant about what is going on in your life, how your son didn’t put his socks in the hamper even though you told him to do it a million times. The people you talk to if you are anxious.
Your tribe, is usually different from your significant other. Not that your spouse isn’t your best friend and your helpmate in all things kids and marriage. But sometimes you just need your tribe of women that get what mothering is all about. That understand why you are annoyed. That try to help the situation by offering advice, bringing you a coffee, or just being there to listen. So where do we find these women to help us through the life of motherhood.
Your Family
This one might be obvious, but there is nothing like a sister, sister-in-law, or cousin that understands where you are coming from. I have fantastic women in my family who are always ready to help me when I am in need, if that is picking up one of my boys from an activity, or just listening to me when I complain about work.
Unfortunately, some moms do not have family near by to talk to, or they are not close to their family. So keep reading for more places to find your tribe.
Your Kids’ Friends’ Moms
So we all think our kids are pretty great, and we are the ones who have taught them to make friends. Since our kids are pretty great, the friends that they surround themselves with are usually great and they learned that from their parents. So there a lot of wonderful moms out there that have great kids like you, and they understand what you are going through. How being a mom is tough, and those moms are probably looking for you also.
This is where I find most of my tribe because these moms get me. They know exactly what is going on with me and how I am feeling because they have kids the same age. They know how to help. So go out and introduce yourself to your kids’ friends’ moms, this might be where you find your tribe.
At Work
Now maybe everyone reading this doesn’t work outside the home, which is cool, but if you do, like me, then take a look at your coworkers. I have found my best tribe people at my job. Seriously, if you work full-time you probably spend more time with these people than your spouse. So get to know them, see if they have kids also. Find out what you have in common and see if you click. There are people at my work that I just click with, and they are the first people I want to tell things to, good news or bad news.
Old Friends
This is not their age, but how long you have been friends with them. These people tend to fade from your life as you all grow and change. But then something can happen and that friend is the first person you want to talk to, and you are just as close as you have always been. These old friends could be part of your tribe if you take time to cultivate that relationship.
I have a best friend from high school (more about her later), but she just found out she was having a baby, and she turned to me for advice. Because we are each other’s tribe. She knew that I had kids, and she knew that I would be here for her, no matter how long it has been since we have talked. These people became your friends for a reason, even way back when, so look at them now as part of your tribe.
Social Media
This might sound kind of funny to find your tribe on social media, but in this day and age social media is everywhere! Facebook isn’t just for finding old friends, it is for finding new friends. And perhaps even tribe friends. So find some social media groups to join or some hashtags that interest you. You might just find your tribe.
Vanessa is a Doctor of Pharmacy who champions natural health. She lives with her husband of 18 years as well as her 12 & 15 year old sons. She aspires to encourage moms on their journey to family wellness through holistic health and essential oils.
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